she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
