so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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