the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize