either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
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