the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
