We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
well you can't waste a boner
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize