Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
