I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Send help, water and tortillas.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
