I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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