love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
