i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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