Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
she told me i tasted like america
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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