You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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