Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
