Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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