hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
