i just wanna soil my oats bro
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
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