I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
the liver wants what the liver wants
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
