ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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