she pinky promised me she was 18
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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