Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
My hand turned me down
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
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