4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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