dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
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they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
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I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.