words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize