Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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