Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize