fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
How does one acquire holy water?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
