Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
We named our party play list daddy issues
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
