wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Randomize
