I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
