Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
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