Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
