Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
