so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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