we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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