After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize