Whoa Z and x make the same sound
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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