We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize