i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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