I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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