dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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