CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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