weddingsv make me drug and hornr
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Sext me about skeletons
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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