My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
