babies were throwing up all over the place
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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