Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
