remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I think weed is turning my hair brown
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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