if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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