I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I should be sponsored by Trojan
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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