Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
