she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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