I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i dont even know how to be here
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Randomize
