I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Is Oprah even human
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Enjoy the penises
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize