My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
